Listen to this whole clip. It's pretty old, but totally awesome.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
Just in case.
I posted a new song on my MySpace. It isn't wizard rock, but rather a real song that I wrote. Just in case you haven't listened to it, the site is www.myspace.com/nbotwizardrock. It will only be up for a limited amount of time. The song is called "I've Paid My Dues". I decided I would give a quick explanation about it.
For the past few years, I have been collecting social security. I don't do it because I want to, I do it because I have to. Never in my life do I want to be considered a welfare rat, and I don't think I am. The only reason I collect on this benefit is because I have difficulty holding a job and doing school at the same time. It is not for a lack of trying. I used to do the work/study program at school, and I would work about 6 hours a week tops. This alone got me so sick and worn out that I ended up in the hospital. I get sick when I do too much. While others can handle doing school and having a job, I find it extremely difficult. If you were to ask a majority of Cystics, I would bet they would tell you the same thing. Of course, there are a select few that push themselves entirely too hard every day and ignore their disease and its progressive deterioration. But I digress. I'm getting off track.
The reason I wrote this song was because I was feeling really rotten about collecting money I didn't think I deserved. I've had remarks thrown my way about my social security that made me feel so little and undeserving it would make anyone cringe. The one thing that has been said to me that has stuck with me the longest is the following. After I told someone I was getting social security benefits, and then I got my new car (because my last one was falling apart and got broken into), their reply was "It must be nice to have a free car." Let me clarify to anyone who has this mindset: This money does not allow me to live "for free". This money just allows me to live and not be a burden to my family while I try and achieve a lasting career. I'm not a nobody who doesn't deserve what I get. I get that money for all the hospitalizations, the missed time out of my life, the pain of procedures, the isolation, and in a sense, just dealing with a chronic disease that I know is going to slowly rob me of anything and everything. So no. My life is not free. I do work for my money, even if it isn't what most people do to work for their money.
I don't mean to be a downer here, because that is not what this is about! I feel great about life right now, I just felt like I should clarify how I think and feel, and maybe people would be more accepting of the choices I'm forced to make. I've paid my dues, now let me be.
For the past few years, I have been collecting social security. I don't do it because I want to, I do it because I have to. Never in my life do I want to be considered a welfare rat, and I don't think I am. The only reason I collect on this benefit is because I have difficulty holding a job and doing school at the same time. It is not for a lack of trying. I used to do the work/study program at school, and I would work about 6 hours a week tops. This alone got me so sick and worn out that I ended up in the hospital. I get sick when I do too much. While others can handle doing school and having a job, I find it extremely difficult. If you were to ask a majority of Cystics, I would bet they would tell you the same thing. Of course, there are a select few that push themselves entirely too hard every day and ignore their disease and its progressive deterioration. But I digress. I'm getting off track.
The reason I wrote this song was because I was feeling really rotten about collecting money I didn't think I deserved. I've had remarks thrown my way about my social security that made me feel so little and undeserving it would make anyone cringe. The one thing that has been said to me that has stuck with me the longest is the following. After I told someone I was getting social security benefits, and then I got my new car (because my last one was falling apart and got broken into), their reply was "It must be nice to have a free car." Let me clarify to anyone who has this mindset: This money does not allow me to live "for free". This money just allows me to live and not be a burden to my family while I try and achieve a lasting career. I'm not a nobody who doesn't deserve what I get. I get that money for all the hospitalizations, the missed time out of my life, the pain of procedures, the isolation, and in a sense, just dealing with a chronic disease that I know is going to slowly rob me of anything and everything. So no. My life is not free. I do work for my money, even if it isn't what most people do to work for their money.
I don't mean to be a downer here, because that is not what this is about! I feel great about life right now, I just felt like I should clarify how I think and feel, and maybe people would be more accepting of the choices I'm forced to make. I've paid my dues, now let me be.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Hypochondriac.
I am a hypochondriac. I've come to that conclusion. I'm even more predisposed to it because I have several illnesses and I am a nursing major. I think the only thing I have to question now is if thinking I'm a hypochondriac is just proving my point. Love it.
Oh, and in case I'm not geek enough, I have made my own wizard rock music. If you want to hear it in all of its terribleness, go to www.myspace.com/nbotwizardrock. If you weren't aware of what wizard rock is, it's making up songs that are 100% about Harry Potter and the books or anything related to it. The genre is legit. Google it.
Oh, and in case I'm not geek enough, I have made my own wizard rock music. If you want to hear it in all of its terribleness, go to www.myspace.com/nbotwizardrock. If you weren't aware of what wizard rock is, it's making up songs that are 100% about Harry Potter and the books or anything related to it. The genre is legit. Google it.
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